You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
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