Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
