Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
well you can't waste a boner
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Randomize
