I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
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Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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