I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize