Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
