Grow some girl-balls and come out already
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize