No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
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