I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
