Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize
