I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Sacagawea was the original milf.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.