I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.