worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
