Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
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