Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
