i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
