It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
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