How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Im part way to drunk.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
