Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Randomize
