It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
Randomize
