the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize