hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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