Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
He felt like a one man threesome
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
