Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
