My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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