is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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