The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
