she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Randomize
