never play flip cup with pint glasses
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
