sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize