whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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