You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
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