he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
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