Have you finally orgasmed yet?
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Randomize
