I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I supernannyed him into submission
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Randomize
