She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
