I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize