Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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