I heard we made out
I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
im holly from the hills drunk
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btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
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Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.