My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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