I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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