so explain again why im purple
no
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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