i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
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