Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Randomize
