I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
Randomize
