How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Randomize
