i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
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he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
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He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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