i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Randomize
