belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Randomize
