Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Randomize