I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
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I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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